What does it mean to be true to your self? Speaking absolute truth? We normally answer that by saying, “obviously, we do not say something that is false –that didn’t actually transpire or repeat words that were not really spoken.” Okay, so that seems easy enough.

      So how about being true to your self? What does that mean to you? Does it mean you don’t dress identical to your sister, brother, girlfriend or cousin? Does it mean you don’t use similar phrases as your spouse, partner, co-worker or friends? Or does it mean acting in a manner that demonstrates your gifts, abilities and talents/skills as you develop or discover them? I think the ladder sounds more like it; How about you?

      Sharing time with others, the prior events tend to happen in varying degrees with one another (though there are those extremes that we may want to be aware of). However, there is another point that we are reaching here for the moment.

      Being authentic to how we were created. Sometimes, when we just stop and think about what that might be or entail, some of us may not be entirely sure what that is. After all, we have spent most of our lives creating a specific life that was encompassed around the expectations of those around us. Such as creating families, fulfilling career or job obligations, fulfilling specific social roles or a “status” that may have been assumed we would take on and the list can go on from church to politics to volunteering. Sometimes it is assumptions according to the dynamics of our environment; such as exposure or lack of in education, finances or social expectations. All of which, looking beyond the assumptions and looking within towards your own desires, drives, abilities to be developed or that have come more naturally –anything is achievable beyond whatever surrounding circumstances you may be or have observed. The question is, with all the roles you chose to take on (regardless of the motivation for doing so –it was expected, you wanted to, you thought you had to, etc.); have you taken the time to stop and ask yourself, “is this expressing who I really am, my abilities and what I truly wish to do with my life to express myself and how I want to share my time?”

      It is never too late to ask yourself this question. Nor can one ask this question only once. The only experience of loss, or lack of fulfillment that you may feel is to have never asked yourself the question at all and then acted upon it with kindness to your self.

      So now we have asked and decided that we want to be more authentic to ourselves. Now what? Now we start making decisions. Decide what events in your life you do enjoy and feel that you are expressing your true abilities and talents by doing them, then you know this is what you want to keep doing. Stop doing what isn’t a true expression of you or stop doing it in a way that doesn’t express the depth of your personality and your genuineness.

      In other words, don’t take on a task, just because someone else thinks you should do it or tells you would be good at it. Do it because you are willing to express your abilities and gifts and time in that area with an earnest effort that comes from within you. That is being true to yourself and honest with other of who you really are. In doing so, you will develop and grow in areas that you may have desired, and have not yet explored until now. Or you will finally let go of the attitude that you have to be the “I will do it to make do” personality and really live your life to a fuller potential. When you do this, others then begin to appreciate what you have to offer more so, as well. The reason is because you now have become more authentic and it will be obvious that your efforts are not forced and you will be expressing joy freely and perhaps even passionately.

      Now your doing more that feels like your abilities, talents and gifts being expressed, but is there more to being true to self? Yes. Taking this just a little further, let’s talk about being true to ourselves with our thoughts and words. Now you might be thinking, “oh, that’s easy, just don’t lie and tell everyone exactly what you think.” Well, we all know that just doesn’t come out that easy. Then the ones that are that blunt, we tend to judge and find fault with. So, clearly we seek a happy medium –we say with a little sarcastic humor.

      First let us remember that not everyone in this world is a genuine clairvoyant. And for those that are, it is not their job to speak for the rest and tell everyone what is truly on their hearts and minds in a manner that will help them co-create their world to their liking and make all their dreams come true. It is each and every beings responsibility (clairvoyant or not) to express there own thoughts, feelings, ideas to the best of their abilities in order to be heard and to co-create the reality they really desire and let others know how they feel or what they want.

      For an added note, a clairvoyant can bring added clarity to matters or issues and may aid in a direction. However, just as a counselor, they are not your sole answer or the one whom is your voice –you are. You are in your body, you are thinking your thoughts and feeling your emotions and you are in control of them, no one else is –so you are the one who will have to share them.

      To be true to your self in this manner is doing just that –speaking your own mind; your own thoughts. You have a right to change them. Once voiced (once you have heard your own words aloud) you have better clarity. Being authentic is not pretending to be one type of personality just because it is who you would “like” to be, but being who you really are. This does not mean that if there were aspects you would like to change within your self that you cannot. You proceed to do so –just don’t lie to yourself if you are not there yet and as a result you will get there sooner.

      In other words, if you are working at becoming more joyful and friendly with others –the concept “fake it ‘til you make” doesn’t work. The reason is, you will be lying to yourself and in turn, lying to others and never achieving your desired goal. However, by first letting go of any thoughts that you cannot be happy or friendly with others is a start. Or letting go of any anger issues you have been holding on to that said “I have to distance myself from people & not get close”; then you can allow yourself to replace that with feelings of peace and joy. Thereby, you will be automatically friendlier with others, feel naturally joyful from within (not forcing it) and this is being true or authentic to you. 

      Anything that is not forced, that feels natural and doesn’t create a sense of internal upset, worry, anxiety, stress, discomfort, anger and negative emotions is an indication that you are being authentic and/or true to yourself. Learn to trust this and you will live a more fulfilling life each and every day.

Namaste’.

Copyright © 2006, 2007 -  Josephine’ Sheppard   -   all right reserved

This article reflects the opinions of the author, and not necessarily those of Coach-Connect or its members.